Saturday, September 12, 2009

Beware the Praise Junkie

I'm back. Today anyway.

As the Little Man grows, starts talking, responding to praise and punishment, and generally turning into a little kid, I was especially interested to read this article.


The author mentions using confirmation of an action (you tied your shoes!) versus praise (wow you tied your shoes so well!). This helps your child know that you're paying attention, but does not make him rely upon you for confirmation of whether or not he is doing a good job.

The Millennial generation grew up with parents who were taught that praise is the "right" way to direct your children's behavior. The result is a generation of praise-junkies, as evidenced by the guidance I am constantly given as a supervisor of new hires. "Praise them. Give them feedback. They need lots of assurance from you that they're on the right track." Some of the advice is even a little bitter (mainly from older generations): "They need to have someone say 'good job' just for showing up to work on time."

Generational tensions aside, I believe that this article has some good advice. I intend to pay attention to my little man, but give him room to build his own sense of when he is doing a good job. However, I'm sure well-deserved praise will continue to flow!

2 comments:

Verva said...

Ahh... raising children is such a balancing act. Too much praise, too little; too much structure, too little; we all just do the best we can and then with luck have amazing adult children in the end. I have two excellent examples of that.

Steve Finnell said...

TRUTH AND AUTHORITY?

Where should Christians look for God's authoritative truth? Should it be the Bible? Should it be the church of your choice or the church you belong to by chance?

The Bible was completed in 95 A.D. when the apostle John wrote Revelation. Who wrote the Bible? Was it God or was it the church?


John 14:24-26 He who does not love Me does not keep My words; and the word which you hear is not Mine, but the Father's who sent me. (THE WORDS JESUS SPOKE WERE FROM GOD THE FATHER) 25 "These things I have spoken to you while abiding with you. 26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all the I said to you.


The words of Jesus were from God the Father and He said that The Father would send the apostles the Holy Spirit so they could remember all that He said. The words of the apostles were God's word, their words were Scripture, their words were the Bible.


In, John 14:24-26, Jesus was not talking to the Pope, John Calvin, Martin Luther, Billy Graham, Joesph Smith Jr, Mary Baker Eddy, cardinals, bishops, elders, so-called modern day apostles, preachers, pastors, nor any one claiming to speak for God. If the church or theses men as individuals, were speaking for God by new revelation, then, we would have added books to the Bible. There would the books of the Popes, the book of John Calvin, the book of Billy Graham, the books of elders, the books of churches, the book of Joesph Smith Jr. etc.


THE BIBLE IS THE AUTHORITY IN THE CHURCH.
THE CHURCH HAS NOT BEEN GIVEN THE AUTHORITY TO CHANGE OR OVERRULE THE AUTHORITY OF THE BIBLE. THE CHURCH CANNOT ADD TO OR TAKE AWAY FROM SCRIPTURE!


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